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Filtering by Tag: How to fuck a stripper

Stripper Knows Best: HAVE I BEEN PLAYED?


Hi, Jacq

I've been seeing a stripper for about a year at her club. She tells me how wonderful I am, can't believe I'm single, I'm one of the most important people in her life. I've asked her out, but she keeps things vague on why she can't. I have her number, she has mine, but she only contacts me to come in to see her.

She has also told me about her children and quite a bit about her life, but no real name. When I asked if she knew someone who would like to go out with me, during a private dance, she had sex with me. I have NEVER asked her for that. Have I been played this entire time? Just a very confusing situation for me. Any answer would be a big help.

Thank you for your time,



Hi, Dave

Thanks for reaching out. It looks like you've got a special relationship with this dancer. She must make you pretty happy if you've been going back to see her all this time.

There seems to be a lot of uncertainty around this relationship, ultimately that you want more from her. It sounds like you'd like to date her. But the only question you asked me is "Have I been played this entire time?"

You are a client, Dave. There is nothing wrong with being a client. What is wrong is to assume that you've been played. You're the one who keeps going in to see her. As a dancer, she seems to have kept up her end of the bargain. She makes you smile, listens to you, and lets you know when she's working so you can see her as often as possible. It sounds like she has pretty established boundaries: she keeps your encounters within the walls of the club (where us dancers feel safe) and she doesn't disclose her legal name (duh). In my experience, this is the smartest and safest way to be a stripper. And then she did something different. You had sex.

Boundaries are tricky because they can bend, stretch or retract over time. How you spend your time in the club can change, but the time is still time spent inside the club. If you're confused about this sex act you two shared, you need to ask her about it, not a stranger on the internet.

You need to be asking yourself if you can accept this relationship as it is right now: You are a client and she is a dancer. It will probably always be this way. Like all clients, you gotta pay to play. If you want to put the blame on the service provider you've actively been seeking out for an entire year, you are only playing yourself.

Good luck,



Anna Nicole Smith - Patron Saint of Strippers


Today is Anna Nicole Smith's Birthday. If she were still with us on this pink and frilly earth, she would be 48. 

No one gives this goddess enough credit. Women get shit on for choosing to be the bimbos we are continually coaxed into being because of porn, patriarchy and the uninventive male libido. 

My girl Anna turned the life she wanted to live into straight up cash money:

She pulled the ultimate ripper move and met her old-as-hell/rich-as-fuck husband in the club!

(If you think you can tell me that this man doesn't look happier than a toddler who just discovered his penis for the first time, you can stop reading right fucking now and never come back to this sacred blog. J Howard Marshall lived his Best Life.)

Anna Nicole Smith is the OG Lady of Leisure that puts the Kardashian clan to shame. She didn't even have to suck dick on film to get there! (Sucking dick on film is fine; paying out your pimp-mother a 50% finder's fee, in my humble opinion, is less fine). 

Anna did it the classy way: she posed for Playboy. 

She discovered a mathematical equation more useful than E = mc 2!

"1 man + 2 beers = $20!"

Her ripper-feminism was on point.

And she loved animals. 

 I never knew you, Anna... but girl, how I love you. Rest in peace, you fluffy queen.