A sugar baby is a young male or female who is financially pampered and cared for by a sugar daddy or sugar mommy in exchange for companionship. Welcome back to Sugar Babies, a column about sugar babies and the food they eat on dates.
Jacq is a 27-year-old writer and stripper. She grew up in Montreal, which is where she first discovered the sugar baby life, after which she became exceptionally good at getting stuff for free—especially nice meals. Jacq now lives in New York with her wife. With her tits out, she gathers stories, which she’s currently compiling into a book titled Flashing My Gash for Cash.
MUNCHIES: When did you start “working” as a sugar baby?
Jacq: When I was 20, I was bartending at this douchey club in downtown Montreal, and one night a guy came in and ordered a cocktail, gave me a hundred bucks, and didn’t want change, which obviously got my attention. He was a Jordanian oil prince in his mid-twenties and was really sweet. The next day we met up for lunch and I gave him a blow-job afterwards, but I would have fooled around with him more if I wasn’t on my period. He had this really beautiful cock, although when he took it out he said, “It’s handsome, right?” which kind of ruined it. Anyway, later we went shopping, and suddenly I had new shoes and Chanel perfume, and afterward I had this moment of, “Oh… so this is how the world works.”
Epiphany! So where did he take you for lunch?
He was visiting from out of town, so I took him to one of my favorite downtown spots, Sho-Dan. They have this sushi pizza that, at 20, I found really novel.
Did that experience pique your interest in sex work?
I wouldn’t have called it sex work yet. I had a middle class upbringing, I was at a fancy university. No one around me was a sex worker. But I was always interested in the idea of it, and I liked the attention, power, and flirtation, but I didn’t want to have sex, necessarily. I just started to realize that life could be free. And so I started Googling…
Which led you to discover sugar daddy websites?
Exactly. At first, all the messages I got were from men who wanted me to travel with them, but I was like “Fuck no, I don’t want to get raped.” Eventually I got a message from this guy Sam who just said “Do you want to go shopping?” He was super old—like a grandpa—and he basically watched me exist. He would take me out shopping and would say, “You can have anything you want.” I told him I wanted Prada pumps, and he was like, “Let’s start with BCBG.” In a way, he was teaching me the process of these types of relationships. You can’t ask for Prada immediately; there’s a mutually beneficial exchange that has to develop over time.
What were your dates with him like?
For the first date we went to Kaizen, this sushi restaurant on Sherbrooke. It’s the kind of restaurant where they acupuncture the fish to sedate them in Japan, then ship them to Montreal where they take the acupuncture needles out, the fish starts flopping around again, and then they kill it. It’s incredibly fresh, but it’s obscenely expensive, like $60 a roll or something. I got some bitchy cocktail like a lychee martini, and then ordered almost everything on the menu. My favorite was the lobster dragon roll. Sam just sat there smiling at me and barely ate anything.
Were you worried that he’d think it was tacky that you ordered so much?
I was starving. I had no money and I didn’t care because I thought he was tacky for being on the website anyway. There’s this mutual judgment that lingers over all types of sex work. When I started working as a stripper, I’d look at the other strippers and be like “Eww, look at all these crack whores.” But that feeling dissipates pretty quickly. You do judge your colleagues at first, and the strippers judge the men who come in, and the men judge the strippers, so everyone is judging everyone. Everyone is fronting. The flip side is that no one cares because you’re never going to see each other again. It’s like, “You’re paying $12 for a Bud Light to see my tits, which means that you’re an idiot, but I’m a slut, so whatever.” So in a way it’s kind of liberating—everyone’s just getting drunk and working out their daddy and mommy issues under black lights.
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